1980 - SMOKEY AND THE BANDIT II, car chase film without car chases

 Curiosity drove me to watch this sequel to Smokey and the Bandit, one of the most popular action comedies of the time.  The rumor was that this sequel was really bad and did not measure up in any way to the first film.  How bad could it be?  Well as it turns out the rumor was absolutely correct.  The film is a complete failure even for a simple minded sequel.  All the filmmakers had to do was remake the original movie but apparently they had loftier ambitions.  The film is an examination of the role of celebrity in America and the toll it can take on the rich and famous, in this case Burt Reynolds and his toupee.

Burt Reynolds is back as the happy go lucky driving ace "The Bandit." The Bandit has fallen on hard times, he's drinking to much and his girlfriend played by Sally Field who at this time were a couple in real life has left him.  He gets a chance to redeem himself with an offer to transport a pregnant elephant to the GOP convention.  Jerry Reed is back as The Bandit's sidekick and Dom DeLuise is the doctor taking care of the pregnant elephant.  You know you're film is in trouble when Dom DeLuise is the most nuanced character in the film.

Back also is The Bandit's nemesis Sheriff Buford T. Justice, in pursuit.   Jackie Gleason is not just playing one character but actually three in total, Gaylord Justice some sort of weird gay character and Reginald Van Justice who sings opera for no apparent reason.  Gleason was clearly allowed to ham it up throughout the film and it's safe to say he's not very funny.  Since this is basically another Burt Reynolds redneck comedy film we have The Statler Brothers, Mel Tillis and Brenda Lee showing up in it.  

 

The film was directed by Hal Needham the stuntman turned director.  Needham is a unique voice in the world of film.  He doesn't know how to direct actors, his staging of scenes is completely pedestrian and he doesn't seem to understand how dialog in films works.  Needham's expertise is in staging car stunts and toward the end of the movie there is a large scale semi-truck versus cop car show down which actually comes to late to save this boring film.  This film is a warm up for Needam's Cannonball Run films.  Needham in his own odd way is actually kind of an auteur he cetrainly has a distinct non style.

This was a career nadir for Reynolds and Sally Field or should I say another career nadir, they made five films together.  Field and Reynolds apparently didn't remember the old Hollywood message, don't act with kids or animals as they are complete scene stealers Smokey and the Bandit II has both.

The film was written by veteran comedy writer Jerry Belson but it's completely unfunny.  The cowriter is a man named Brock Yates who was one of the actual organizers of the real Cannonball coast to coast race.

As with many films in the world of cinema, Smokey and the Bandit II will sink out of sight and at best be a distant memory and a tribute to the inability of Hollywood to offer even simple minded entertainments to the movie going masses.

The running time is 101 minutes.

1984 - CANNONBALL RUN II, creative disaster or brillant parody

 So shockingly bad as a film it almost had to be deliberate.  The sequel to a film probably nobody wanted and a big career killer for one time box office champ Burt Reynolds.  The film almost defies any attempt to summarize the plot or explain the strange casting that prevails throughout the film.

Burt Reynolds and Dom DeLuise are part of a racing team with DeLuise also playing his alter ego Captain Chaos and an Italian mobster called Don Canneloni.  Members of Don Canneloni's gang include Abe Vigoda, Alex Rocco, Henry Silva and playwright Michael V. Gazzo.  Hispanic actor Ricardo Montalban plays an Arab Shiek with Jamie Farr playing his son.  It just gets weirder.

Dean Martin and Sammy Davis Jr. are in the film, Frank Sinatra also makes a brief appearance so this is the final bow of the notorious Las Vegas "Rat Pack".  Shirley MacLaine and Marilu Henner are nuns and Susan Anton and Catherine Bach are a couple of drivers not above using their chests to gain an advantage during the race.

 

Throw in appearances by Telly Savalas, Charles Nelson Riley, Tim Conway, Don Knotts, Jim Nabors, Jack Elam and god knows who else and you have a who's who of the 1980's Hollywood performer scene.  Did I mention there is also an orangutan involved. The film was partially financed by Golden Harvest a company that Jackie Chan was associated with so Chan ends up appearing as one of the drivers along with former James Bond villain Richard Kiel. Chan's participation guaranteed box office success in Asia.

 

The mess was directed by Hal Needham a former stuntman who was also a buddy of Burt Reynolds.  Needham was an expert in staging car stunts but not much else, he lets the actors run amok throughout the film.  

Obviously just describing the cast should give you an idea of what you are getting into.  The film was written by Harvey Miller and Hal Needham, the running time is 108 very bizarre minutes.

1982 - MEGAFORCE, a Hal Needham film.

From Albert Ruddy the producer of The Godfather and auteur director Hal Needham comes this would be Star Wars ripoff of I don't know ineptitude, stupidity, unintentional action comedy, you name it. 

It would be easy to write a "rip into the movie review' on this one but suffice it to say this movie lays it self wide open for a barrage of cheap shots from amateur film blog reviewers like myself.

However we can look at some of the peripheral parts of the film.  A quick google search on this film shows websites with a lot of Megaforce toys for sale.  As part of the marketing for this film a whole series of little toy cycles or souped up trucks were created, when Megaforce bombed the toys disappeared as fast as the movie only to find a home on ebay like websites.

Finally there is this account from the IMDB page on this film.

"One of the first jobs I ever had was with a catering company. Imagine our excitement being hired on for the desert-location filming of MEGAFORCE! Everyone involved with the film seemed quite confident that it was going to become a smash summer hit.

Watching the filming at Nevada's dry lakes, it did feel like something momentous was in the making, but nobody could have imagined just how negative a reaction this movie was going to receive. I almost didn't want to see it, but curiosity got the better of me. Truthfully, I don't think it's nearly as horrible as many have made it out to be, though it's certainly not *good*, either. There's enough vehicle stunts, random explosions, and weapons futurismo to keep average 12-year-olds very entertained, and I think that may be exactly what Hal Needham intended for this project.

I still have a box filled with t-shirts, ball-caps, and other promotional crap emblazoned with "DEEDS, NOT WORDS". It may not have the iconic carriage of, say, "MAY THE FORCE BE WITH YOU", but I'll keep these things for posterity, anyhow...

...and I hope everyone on the set enjoyed the food..."

99 minutes.

1981 - CANNONBALL RUN pretty bad but should be seen

There's got to be some place in film history for this terrible film.  Considering the cast, Hollywood in-jokes and driving stunts from the legendary stuntman tuned mediocre director Hal Neeham the film is some kind of milestone.

Burt Reynolds is the star of the film and Cannonball Run is really the end of his run as a major Hollywood star.  Too many bad films finally did him in.  Dino and Sammy show up dressed as a couple of boozing priests.  With the participation of these former members of The Rat Pack Cannonball Run is thematically linked to films like Ocean's 11 and Robin and the Seven Hoods.  These films are big Hollywood in jokes making money by ripping off the public pretending to be entertainment.

Since the film was produced by Golden Harvest the production company Jackie Chan was associated with.  The Chinese actor Chan is cast as a Japanese driver.  You get to see Chan speak in his original voice and beat up Peter Fonda reprising his original biker role of "Blues" from The Wild Angels.

Farrah Fawcett the eye candy in this film, she has absolutely no chemistry with any of the cast especially Reynolds.  Fawcett lasted one season on Charlie's Angels and tried her damnedest to make a career for herself as a serious actress with mixed results.  She looks and acts in the film like she would really like to be someplace else.  

The film also has one of the most bizarre supporting casts in the movies.   Mel Tillis doing his weird stuttering character, Jack Elam hamming it up mercilessly,  Jimmy the Greek Snyder,  Adrienne Barbeau and her breasts, Roger Moore in the Aston Martin, dumbbell ex football jock and NFL commentator Terry Bradshaw, game show host Bert Convey, Warren Berlinger star of many mediocre Disney films and George Furth who was frequently associated with Steven Sondheim

20th Century Fox forced theaters to take this film and it had a mass release in the summer of 81.  It made money but clearly everyone associated with it knew it was pretty bad.

The director Hal Needham was a buddy of Burt Reynolds.  Needham had been a stuntman and stunt coordinator for years, he knew how to stage car crashes and stunts but his direction was so pedestrian, the dangerous driving looks pretty unexciting throughout the film.

95 minutes, written by Brock Yates one of the actual creators of the real Cannonball race.