1991 - MCBAIN, underachieving action film

The writer/director James Glickenhaus who made the entertaining urban thriller Shakedown sure didn't try very hard with this film, in fact you could say he didn't seem to try at all.  McBain is a real "by the numbers" action film.  

Christopher Walken is McBain out to avenge an old Vietnam War buddy who has been killed by an evil South American dictator.  After being alerted to the death of his friend by that friend's hot Hispanic sister played by María Conchita Alonso.  Walken rounds up his old Vietnam war platoon buddies and heads to South America where they shoot and blow up a lot of stuff.

The film leaves no cliche untouched and the story is so rote it gives the word rote a bad name.  Even the action scenes are incredibly lackluster.  Lots and lots of stuff blows up but it's presented in such a nonchalant way that even blowing people and machines up seems like an afterthought.

 

Walken is an actor from the less is more school of acting.  He so underplays his part it seems like he is almost in a different movie or hoping he was in a different movie. Maria Conchita Alonso in her prime was a great beauty but her acting to put in charitably leaves a lot to be desired.

 

McBain is an odd action film, Glickenhaus should have been able at the very least  provide some entertainment with the usual shooting and killing stuff but the film gives off the vibe of a director who has a complete lack of interest in the film or even the film making process.

The running time is 107 minutes.

2019 - CHARLIE'S ANGELS, second try at starting a film franchise

If at first you don't succeed try again, or so it goes with this second reboot of the sort of popular but very mediocre television series about three women who work as private investigators for a mysterious individual called Charley.  Frankly the television series really wasn't much.  The weekly stories were nothing special to put it generously.  The audience basically tuned in to see three attractive women in some sort of danger every week.  The original series limped along for about five years.  Drew Barrymore looking to enter into film production put together a film based on the series in 2000, that film did okay commercially so a sequel was released in 2003 which didn't do as well, end of story.

Until 2019, when an attempt was made once again to start a franchise this time with Hollywood overachiever Elizabeth Banks directing and taking screenplay credit.  Banks fashioned a film that supposedly was more empowering for the women playing the "angels" but there was still the usual amount of male leering at these good looking women.  Banks also created a part for herself in the film as if writing and directing wasn't enough of a challenge.

 

Kristen Stewart, usually associated with serious films was cast as one of the angels. She did get to show her silly side throughout the film while improbably beating up a lot of bad guys.  The other two women, Naomi Scott and Ella Balinska made up the team but they were kind of forgettable and this film really didn't do much for their careers.

 

Elizabeth Banks did a decent job with what was essentially a light weight summer film.  However audiences male and female didn't show up for the film.  The film is a very undemanding action film with a little lip service paid to women who are as tough as men and just happen to look like fashion models.

Running time, 118 minutes.

2023 - BARBIE, unsually entertaining summer film

This entertaining summer comedy should if anything send a message to Hollywood that not every summer film has to be some action film or the latest retread of a DC or Marvel superhero series.  The film has been cleverly marketed and mostly emphasizes the silliness of the Barbie world.

However what I think most audiences discovered (at least I did) was that the film was actually rather subversive.  The film has messages of female empowerment and calls out as many critics noted, the theme of the controlling world of the "male hierarchy."  But these themes are very lightly emphasized for the most part.  The studio and the makers of the film weren't about to endorse some politically radical summer movie that would alienate audiences.

  

The makers of the film in this case the director Greta Gerwig who along with her writing partner Noah Baumbach have mixed a lot of stuff, satire, silliness and some musical numbers into this film.  Noah Baumbach and and Greta Gerwig are usually associated with smart independent films,  but these two are very intelligent people who know how to craft intelligent films.  Gerwig the director has also assembled a group of talented artists who have done an excellent job creating the Barbie world.

A quick note about the cast.  Obviously Margo Robbie as Barbie is excellent and Ryan Gosling as a  Ken doll trying to empower himself in the manly arts of being a dominate male.  The rest of the cast performs and a fairly high comedic level as well.  Michael Cera is the Ken doll's friend Allen, Ilsa Ray is President Barbie, Kate McKinnon is weird Barbie and John Cena as a merman Ken to name a few.  Also a quick call our for America Ferrera and and Ariana Greenblatt as a mother and daughter with a troubled relationship who ultimately are key to resolving the plot (such that is is) to the film.

 The running time is 114 minutes.

1979 - SUNBURN, features a real life Barbie Doll Farrah Fawcett.

The Farrah Fawcett phenomenon was probably at it's peak with the release of Sunburn a comedy thriller.  Farrah was still billing herself as Farrah Fawcett-Majors until her divorce from actor Lee Majors after which she dropped the "Majors" part of her name.  Farrah was big stuff in the entertainment world for a while during the mid 1970's.  She was a California blonde who looked like a real life Barbie doll.  She had been working in the movie and TV business for a few years performing in bit parts until she hit the big time with the mediocre television show Charlie's Angels.  Not satisfied with being on TV,  Farrah made the jump to movies where she started in a couple of mediocre films, Sunburn being one of them.

Sunburn is a comedy/thriller which has Farrah and her co-stars Charles Grodin and Art Carney attempting to solve the death of a rich guy in Acapulco.  Farrah has been hired by private investigator Grodin to pretend to be his wife. Art Carney is Grodin's associate helping with the case.  Other actors that show up are Joan Collins, William Daniels, Keenan Wynn and Eleanor Parker.  Sunburn was designed to be a showpiece for Farrah but as it turned out Grodin and Carney with their comedy "chops" easily steal the movie away from her.

Farrah wears a number of outfits throughout the film to showcase her looks.  My favorite is a very impractical wet suit that would really be a rubber fetish weirdo's dream.  Farrah ends up helping Grodin and Carney solve the mystery while falling in love with Grodin. 

The film has some lame comedy bits, some shootouts and a car chase.  The director Richard C. Sarafian keeps things moving along but the screenplay really lacks wit and frankly at this point in her career Farrah really wasn't much of a performer.  I suppose the film is of historical importance as it's another case of Hollywood's ability to make a good looking woman into an icon for a while. 

This isn't much of a film,  Alfred Hitchcock was the kind of filmmaker who could do the "beautiful people, beautiful places" films of which this tries to be, when he worked at Paramount.  Hitchcock could bring a lot more style to these kind of comedy thrillers..  The film didn't do anything for Farrah's career and a few years later was appearing in The Cannonball Run.

The film was written by James Booth, John Daly and Stephen Oliver, the running time is 99 minutes. 

1997 - LIVE FLESH, an erotic thriller that's actually erotic for a change

Keeping in mind most of these erotic film thrillers that show up on various streaming platforms aren't particularly erotic, Live Flesh is one of the few films in this genre that actually manages to mix eroticism and sex with an interesting story for a change.

The film is basically about the interactions of five characters, a paralyzed former police detective, his wife, his former partner, the partner's wife and the man who was responsible for the bullet that paralyzed the police detective.  The film involves their relationships and interactions from the the time the detective was shot to the present and the consequences of that act.

 

The direction by Almodovar is about as good as you are ever going to see it. His skill with the actors, the camerawork and locations really elevate what is usually a tawdry and mediocre genre of film makingn into something good .

To reveal more about this film would spoil it.  The film was written by Almodovar and the running time is 103 minutes.

1981 - HEAVY METAL, the adults only animated film

A series of animated science fiction and fantasy stories based on stories from a magazine called Heavy Metal.  The quality of the animation is extremely variable but the look of the film is interesting for the most part.  The film ties together nine stories with some sort of interconnecting theme of a mysterious green orb that has the power to do evil things or something like that.

Heavy Metal has a lot of vocal talent but it's chief interest for me were some of the performers of the SCTV TV show contributing to the various episodes.  I identified John Candy with his distinctive voice in three of the episodes, Joe Flaherty, Harold Ramis and Eugene Levy are in a couple of the stories.  "Dean Wormer" himself, John Vernon from Animal House and the writer Doug Kenny of Animal House and Caddyshack fame are also in the film.  This casting is probably unsurprising since one of the producers of the film is Ivan Reitman who went on to have a fairly successful career with films like Ghostbusters, Stripes, Twins and Kindergarten Cop .  Reitman had been associated with most of these performers off and on during their careers.

 

OK back to film.  Heavy Metal's reputation rests chiefly on it's blend of nudity, sex and violence.  So if your tolerance for this kind of stuff, particularly in a cartoon format is low, this film is probably not for you.  As I said the film does look interesting and you have to give the production and animation team points for making something different.  

The film has a rock score from Black Sabbath, Blue Oyser Cult, Sammy Hagar, Cheap Trick  DEVO, Journey and Nazareth but I don't recall any of the music particularly standing out.  Hollywood composer Elmer Bernstein of all people provided the symphonic score.

 

Heavy Metal has a series of writers and directors but the writer Dan O'Bannon (Dark Star, Alien, Total Recall) is the only person who I recognize.  The running time of this film is 90 minutes which is just fine as a little of this cartoon sex and violence stuff can only go so far in an animated film.

1951 - DISTANT DRUMS, a western set in Florida

With the exception of the rather novel setting of Florida this is very much a Gary Cooper western which could just as easily have been set in California.  Cooper plays an army captain sent on a mission to stop guns from being sent to the in this case to some very nasty Seminole Indians.  After fulfilling his mission of blowing up the fort with the guns that had been supplying the Seminoles, Cooper and his troops are pursued by the Seminoles through the Florida Everglades.  This is basically the same plot as the director Raoul Walsh's Objective Burma.  But if the story worked once it will work again I guess.

 Along the way Cooper picks up a sexy gal who you know will end up falling in love with him played in this case by a performer named Mari Aldon.  Also along is veteran character actor Arthur Hunnicutt who as usual is playing Arthur Hunnicutt.

The film was written and not very well,  by a couple of decent writers, Niven Busch and Martin Rackin.  The director was old action pro Raoul Walsh.  If the film has any interest at all it's the extensive on location filming in Florida and Walsh's skill with staging action scenes.  Otherwise this film just seems completely out of it even for a 1950's film.

 

The running time is 101 minutes.

1950 - KING SOLOMON'S MINES, movie adventure in the grand tradition

MGM put to together a lavish remake of this old H. Rider Haggard story featuring the character Alan Quatermain.  Quatermain is  clearly the inspiration for Indiana Jones and just about every other adventurer in the movies.  

With this film MGM shot on location in Africa in what must have been really challenging locations considering the period the film was made in.  The story in a very brief nutshell has Quatermain leading a safari in search of the missing husband of Deborah Kerr.   The husband apparently had a map which lead to the fabled King Solomon's diamond mines. The various incidents that occur along the safari highlight the on location scenes and the wild animals of Africa.

Stuart Granger plays Alan Quatermain and Deborah Kerr with her flaming red hair (photographed in technicolor) is obviously going to be the love interest.  But probably the most interesting casting are the native Masai tribe.  I doubt any audience had seen anything like them especially while they were performing their ceremonial dances.

 

The film was photographed by Robert Surtees one of MGM's greatest cameramen who particularly excelled at color photography. Surtees had a long career starting in 1928 and working until 1978.  When you needed someone to master a complex production and produce great photography he was the man.

 

Compton Bennett was the original director but was replaced by Andrew Marton a specialist in photographing "2nd unit" action.  In this instance Marton was the right man for the job, King Solomon's Mines is a classic Hollywood adventure film.

The film was written by Helen Deutsch another old Hollywood pro, the running time is 103 minutes.

1964 - FATHER GOOSE, is all about Cary Grant

Cary Grant is one picture away from wrapping up his career with Father Goose.  Grant was probably in his middle to late 60's when he made this film and Father Goose is a good example of how his comedy timing and sensibilities can enhance a rather routine comedy.

Grant plays a coast watcher stuck on a Pacific island during World War II his job is to report the movements of the Japanese fleet.  Grant plays an antisocial beach bum.  He's not dressed impeccably and it looks like he hasn't shaved in a couple of days, but he's still Cary Grant.  With the usual plot twists, Grant ends up saving the lives of a French school teacher and her students played by Leslie Caron.  You can probably figure out the rest of the story from this point.

 

Cary Grant was so good at these kind of light comedy performances that he can easily overwhelm a bunch of scene stealing kids.  The writers don't work very hard to whip up a relationship between Caron and Grant.  I would venture to say that Grant's best partner in this film is Trevor Howard as the navy commander he reports to.

 

The film is credited to three writers one of them being Peter Stone who was a clever writer but in this case inspiration in the story department seems a little lacking.  The film is certainly a pleasant enough entertainment.  Ralph Nelson directed and he was usually good working with actors when he had a decent script

Written by Peter Stone and Frank Tarloff, the running time is 118 minutes.

1990 - THE FLASH, pilot for the earlier TV series

With the release of the expensive 2023 superhero film called The Flash it's time to take a quick look at the TV pilot for a series that ran for 22 episodes in the early 1990's.  For a TV pilot and especially a TV pilot made almost 20 years ago,  this show had a fairly decent budget.  The creators of the series Danny Bilson and Paul De Meo were basically writers and producers of "B" movies such as the Trancers series, and Zone Troopers.  They had also worked in the video game and comic book industries so they brought a comic book sensibility to the series. Their one big credit was for Disney's film of The Rocketeer.

This pilot had an above average cast for a TV show,  Tim Thomerson, Richard Belzer, Mark Hamill and M. Emmet Walsh.  The lead role of The Flash was played by John Wesley Shipp who had spent a lot of time in the daytime soap opera world. Amanda Pays is his scientist/girlfriend partner who is there to support his superhero abilities,  a typically standard and thankless character for these kinds of shows.

 

The TV pilot is decent enough.   It's your standard superhero origin story. Scientist Barry Allen gets struck by lighting and gets weird chemicals dumped on him which turns him into the fastest man alive, blah blah blah. The pilot episode has The Flash learning about his new powers and taking on an evil motorcycle gang,  blah blah blah.  Frankly the story is nothing special but the speed running special effects and actions scenes are well done and hold up well.

 The Flash TV series probably hit at the wrong time, the superhero craze didn't really take off until around 2008 with the Marvel movies. 

 

Running time, 94 minutes, written by Danny Bilson and Paul De Meo.

2023 - ANT-MAN AND WASP QUANTUMANIA, been down this road before

Basically a very unsatisfying film but taking shots at this film is just way to easy.  This Ant-Man film is the third in the series and I believe it is supposed to be the start of another phase of the Marvel movie universe series whatever that is.

This time Ant-Man and the gang get hurtled back to somewhere called the Quantum Realm where they meet some bad guy called Kang. Kang is the the dictator of this place and is obviously not a nice guy.  Kang is also another version of the Thanos character from the earlier Marvel movies that focused on the Avengers.  

Ant-Man and his girlfriend the Wasp along with Ant-Man's daughter and the Wasp's father and mother help ferment an uprising against Kang.  The ending of the film is supposed to prepare the viewer for more Kang duplicates in what is going to be another big showdown of the good guys vs the bad guys. 

 

The whole film frankly has a been there done that feel to it.  You know from the start the direction the film will take and you kind of sit in a stupor waiting for this overlong turkey to come to an end.  I also hate to say it but the cast is beginning to look a little long in the tooth.   It seems that Ant-Man and the gang should be settling down into more stable occupations and getting their 401-K's in order.

  

There has been criticism of the special effects in this film but they seem fine to me.  What the film really lacks is humor which was a selling point in the first two films in this series.  The film's biggest issue is plain old fatigue, the whole film is just tired and boring.

Written by  Jeff Loveness, 124 minutes.